My perfect record is broken, darn!

For three weeks I've been meditating 8 minutes a day, every day. Except yesterday. I kept thinking, I'll do it later. Well, later didn't come. Woke up this morning and realized that I forgot to meditate yesterday. You would think that this is no big deal, it's not like forgetting to medicate. Or is it. I'm feeling off. Kinda of like something is missing. What to do, what to do...

Well, I'm darn sure gonna make sure that I meditate today, and get back on track. And I'll forgive myself for slacking off.

Been busy painting our store for the grand opening on January 14th. It's a small space, in Byron (part of London, On) and you would think that it wouldn't take long to paint. Wrong. All the walls are retail slat walls. They have been painted a dark red. I don't want them to be a dark red, would prefer a soft mauve. So on goes the primer. I am currently painting all the grooves in the slat wall. It takes time. A lot of time. The fun has gone out of it.

Mephestopheles has painted the ceiling, bless his heart. He has been totally helpful, and so far he hasn't fallen off the ladder. He did however get an eyefull of paint. He said that it stung pretty bad.

Good ole Meph. tends to be accident prone. He recently won an electric drill at a Christmas party. My first thought: "Better make sure the first aid kit is up to date".

Still meditating

Meditating is fun! And relaxing. And good for you. No I'm not being sarcastic, it really is all that. I finally read a book that I had bought eons ago about meditation, and it really works for me.

You are instructed to meditate for 8 minutes each day for seven days just doing one thing, for example: the first week all I had to do was really listen to my breath, feel it in my body, my nostrils, going down the back of my throat etc.

Sure my thoughts ran away with me constantly, but, as the book advised, I allowed them to come and gently released them. It actually works, I bet out of 8 minutes, I had about 10 seconds of pure meditation. Ten seconds is better than nothing.

This week, my 8 minute meditation is focussed on hearing the sounds around me. Not judging them, just listening to them. I am finding more space between my thoughts than last week. I'm probably getting about 20 seconds of pure meditation. Major improvement.

Any meditation is good meditation. The only bad meditation is no meditation. So, if I sit still for 8 minutes every day and have a thought fest going in my mind, it's still all good. Things will chill after a while, I can feel it.

I'm going to meditate on that right now. (You could see that one coming, right.)

Is it just me...

Is it just me or is meditating something that is darn near next to impossible. Meditation experts say that it is important to pay attention to your breathing. When I do so, I find that suddenly, I don't know how to breathe very well...let's see inhale--pause--did I pause long enough?--OK I'm getting lightheaded, time to exhale--exhale--oh geez how do you know when you have exhaled long enough--wait I need air NOW--inhale down to my stomach, wow that's not very comfortable is it?--pause, ummm OK that's long enough--exhale--crap, do I exhale through my nose or my mouth--nose it is, I don't like exhaling through my mouth even though it might be wrong--I should look that up---ummm pause then inhale or is that inhale and then pause---ARRGH.

Despite my difficulties, I will continue my meditation moments daily (I have lots of time on my hands) and hopefully will become more comfortable with it. I want to listen to that "silence within" that Wayne Dyer is so fond of speaking about. My question is, however, "If you listen to the silence, is it really silent" .

Think about it. But not too hard.

Only 14 days since the last post...

I know... I know what I said in my last post. But hey, I was never good at keeping New Year's resolutions either. Anyhoo...

Attended my second meeting of the London Gem and Mineral Society (LGMS) last night. The speaker a smart guy from UWO who spoke about meteors and impact craters. Scary stuff. We really are at the mercy of the heavens.

The talk was interesting and informative. My hubby, Derek (also sometimes known as Mephistopheles, with good reason, joker that he is) totally was into the subject. On our way home, I asked him if he ever thought he'd be interested in this subject matter, and in minerals in general and he said that no he never thought so, but that he's glad he has developed an interest in it.

This summer we plan on going to Thunder Bay to search for Amethyst in mines open to the general public. I can hardly wait. Fresh air, hiking, finding cool specimens, it brings out the kid in me.

Just a reminder, if anyone happens to be in London, Ontario the weekend of November 22 and 23 check out the London Gem @ Mineral Show. To be held at the Western Fair Grounds, Special Events Building in London, Ontario. Admission is $5 for adults and $2 for kids. There will be demonstrations, silent auctions, door prizes, kid's mine, gold panning for kids. Fun for the whole family. For more info check out their website http://www.gemandmineral.ca/

I'll get it right someday...maybe

I just finished reading an e-newsletter from Small Business at about.com They have interesting articles with lots of valuable information. This issue was about blogging, and apparently I am doing everything wrong.

1) I don't blog often enough. Ideally I should be blogging daily. I haven't been doing this.

2) If I want this to be a business blog, since I do own a retail operation called Moonstone Path, I should be talking more about my products.

I will try to do both from now on but I make no guarantees. First of all, I can go for days without having anything interesting to say. Secondly, I'm lazy.

However, I do enjoy blogging, and I do want my business to succeed so I will apply myself a little bit more.

Affirmation: Blogging comes to me easily and effortlessly and for my highest good.

Or something along those lines.

The Law of Attraction doesn't work when...

The Law of Attraction doesn't work when you don't really know what the heck you want. I believe that LOA works. It makes sense to me. I've read The Field by Lynn McTaggart, some of those concepts resonate. But I've had a problem with the Law of Attraction. I really didn't know what I wanted. Oh, I thought I did (2 million dollars for starters) but, really, I realize now that this was not what I really wanted.

It's true.

Oh sure, having this amount of money would solve a lot of problems, but then what?

This money would buy me trips, clothes, nice home, car etc, but then what?

OK, well a new wii, new tv, nice furniture and new flooring to replace our quickly fading carpet, but then what?

Well, sure, a new laptop, probably an opportunity to have my own store, tickets to the theatre, but then what?

I realized, that I didn't want the money. That's too easy. What I want is the inspiration, creativity and genius to generate that amount of money. I want the excitement of coming up with an idea, a creative work of genius to excite me to my very foundation. And a comfortable income. That's what I want.

New affirmation: I am divinely inspired with creative ideas and prosperous actions.

That little Voice Which I never Listen to

You know that one, it's the voice in your mind that prompts you to do something different. It's the voice that tempts you to step out of your comfort zone. It's the voice that your rational self immediately shouts "Don't listen to it, you're being irrational!!!"

Well I didn't listen to that voice when it said "go ahead, buy a couple of belly-dancing costumes, they'll sell, really."

OK ~ word of explanation here: I own a small (I mean really small) retail business that sells body, mind and spirit products, books, and giftware. I've just added a line of pashmina-style scarves. The lady who wholesales them to me is, like myself, a small business entrepreneur and we hit it off and I ended up buying lots and lots of beautiful scarves.

At the end of our meeting she said that she also carries belly-dancing costumes and wondered if I would be interested in getting a couple of them.

That's when my little voice kicked in and said "What a great idea"

That's when my rational self woke up and loudly proclaimed that this was actually a really bad idea and that they would never sell. Guess what I listened to?

In the last three weeks, I have had 3 requests for belly-dancing costumes. Guess what I'll be ordering shortly?

Always listen to your little voice.

Good, good vibrations

OK, some may have noticed that my snarlyness surfaced in yesterday's blog. I was having a grumpy day. So, I put out to the heavens that I'd like some relief from all this angst, and God and the Universe answered me. The first thing to happen was that I had the pleasure of watching Louise Hay's You Can Heal Your Life video. I was expecting a shallow and simplistic rendition a la "The Secret" (yeah, I go back and forth on that one), but what I got instead was a movie that was well put together, that was really uplifting and put hope in my heart. It actually made me cry, but in a good way.

The Second thing to happen, was that I actually followed up on my plans to attend the London Gem and Mineral Society meeting last night. You see, I had planned on doing this for the last six months, but whenever the night arrived (the meeting is the first Thursday of every month) I would either forget about it, or I would decide that I just didn't feel like going (I normally don't like to go anywhere after supper where my evening gassiness might rear it's ugly head). But this time I was bound and determined to go no matter what (kind of like keeping that dentist appointment). I wasn't really looking forward to it, after all the guest speaker was going to talk about trilobites, not one of my major interests, but no matter, I was going and that was that. I can be a real killjoy when it comes to fun outings. I've cancelled a lot of planned events due to my lack of adventure (and I suspect, shyness).

Well, the meeting was really interesting and dare I say it, I had a great time. My husband did too. I was suffused with a joie de vivre that I hadn't experienced in a while. Maybe living like a hermit is not always good. Anyhow, Derek and I are now official members of the London Gem and Mineral Society. I can't wait till the next one where a guest speaker will talk about meteorites (ooooh shiver of anticipation up and down my spine).

If anyone who lives near or in London Ontario is reading this post and interested in attending the next meeting, it will be held at the Sir Frederick Banting High School, Rm 137, 125 Sherwood Forest Square, London Ontario (near Wonderland and Gainsborough Rds). It will be on the first Thursday of the month (except in January). If you have any questions call 519-245-2741 or check out the website @ www.element51.com/lgms.htm

Now, I'm going to write my affirmations like Louise suggested, because I think she is on the right track with the Law of Attraction. As a matter of fact I know she's right. Back in 1999, I started writing affirmations because I was going through a tough time. I had just bought (at a friend's suggestion) her book, You Can Heal Your Life and had finished reading Catherine Ponder's book The Dynamic Laws of Prosperity which really believes in affirmations. I must have filled 2 large notebooks with different affirmations that I wrote 15 times each. At the time I was going through some difficult crap and writing the affirmations over and over was actually calming and meditative. Looking back, I see that a lot of my affirmations came true. I haven't written affirmations for about 3 years now, and you know, I think it's time to pick up that pen again.

If I'm OK, why do I feel so crappy?

Got my blood results back and everything checks out fine. My red blood cells are increasing, my iron level is going up, apparently I'm not going to die just yet. However, I still feel tired, crappy, achy, fuzzy headed and in general, not so good. Is that normal? I am getting long in the tooth. Actually that's a wrong metaphor - long in the tooth (meaning old), my teeth are actually getting shorter since I grind them at night. Anyway, does getting older mean that I'm going to feel crappy the majority of the time? Is that fair? Or should I get a different doctor. I asked him about taking Prozac for 10 (yes) ten years and if I was suffering side effects from taking it so long. He dismissed my worries pretty quick, saying that I was worrying for nothing. I'm thinking of getting a second opinion. Besides, if I'm on Prozac, should I be worrying? Just asking.

Just got done reading a book by Ervin Laszlo called "Quantum Shift in the Global Brain: How the New Scientific Reality Can Change Us and Our World". He says that we are very much on the brink of extinction, that the planet can't sustain us any longer and that it's just a matter of time before life as we know it ends. He goes on to say, that we have to change how we think (ego and materialistic) and become more compassionate for the less fortunate, the starving and homeless. Business has to change it's priority from amassing wealth to functioning in a conscious and environmental way. Governments need to get along and that we all should be very considerate of each other. Sounds like a piece of cake, doesn't it. He makes good points, and I would love to see these wonderful things happen.

But, will terrorists, drug dealers, child and woman abusers and other nasty people in general decide to be more considerate of others. Will religious and political persecution end? Will politicians finally tell the truth? Will business become more environmentally conscious and stop polluting? Will bullies stop bullying? Will forests and farmland be protected? Will bosses stop making employees' lives miserable? Will people stop shooting people in order to win an argument? Will puppy mills cease to exist? Will shoplifters stop buying things without money? Maybe when all our backs are against the wall and we face absolute extinction we will do something about it. We will still be behaving in our best interests (saving our skins), but at least the world will be a better place.

If anybody has an idea about making this world a better place no matter in how small a way, please let me know. I for one am going to do a lot of praying for inspiration.

It's a start.

Still trying to find results

The barium enema checkup turned up nothing unusual or newsworthy in my large bowel. Now I have to wait a couple of weeks and have more blood taken to see why my hemoglobin count is so low. The good news is that I don't have to prepare for this blood test--no fasting or anything. The bad news is that I hate needles. Oh well...

On a lighter note, well not really, I've just read "God is not Great" by Christopher Hitchens. He comes across as a very angry man. Totally doesn't believe God exists, and really dislikes all forms of religion, from Christianity to Islam to Buddhism. True, horrible actions have been committed in the name of God, but there has been a lot of good too. I do agree that we (us humans) are responsible for our actions, and it is not the fear of God, but our conscience that stops us from doing bad things (also fear of punishment - though the way the justice system is running these days, there's not much to fear).

I still think that there is something bigger than us that is all good, all loving, all knowing, be it called God, or the Universe or whatever. I just feel it in my bones. Is this hope, blind faith? Or is it that certain "knowing" (also known as intuition) that we (again, us humans) are born with and that we can access with practice?

I doubt that science will ever be able to prove or disprove the existence of Something Holy and Universal. It would be nice to have signs of this being - like supernatural occurrences. Of course, maybe there are supernatural events going on around us all the time, and we just don't see them. Now that's something to think about.

So, the biblical God really does not ring true for me. I think it is an interpretation of what was thought were some divine happenings made by a people that were struggling to make sense of their world. But, my inner knowing, my intuition, my wacky sense of hope and joy tell me that there is something wonderful and spiritual, and that it is our joyful duty to get to know it.

Though he is probably is in it for the money (after all everyone needs to make a living), I think Wayne Dyer has a good grip on this philosophy.

The Day Before the Barium Enema Test (aka Hell Day)

Today I had a barium enema test done. No fun at all, see previous blog. Yesterday wasn't so great. I had to take laxatives and then drink that weird fizzy drink to clear my bowels out completely. All I could have was clear juices, jello and clear broth. By two o'clock in the afternoon, I was going crazy with hunger. I checked my prep instructions again to see if I had misunderstood the food restrictions. the List said: Restriction to clear liquids the day prior to procedure. Hmmmm...did that mean only clear liquids with my meals as opposed to milk? It was possible I had misunderstood the instructions. To be sure, I called the phone number provided at the bottom of my list.

Here's how the conversation went:

Me: Hi, I'm have a barium enema done tomorrow and I just wanted to be clear on the food restrictions.

Woman Who Answered the Phone: You are restricted to a clear liquids diet the day before your test.

Me: Does that mean I can't have food.

W.H.A.T.P: It means that you are restricted to a clear liquids diet for the day, and nothing to eat or drink after midnight.

Me: uh unh. So....I can only drink clear liquids, no food, right?

W.H.A.T.P: I means you are to have only clear liquids. You can also have jello if you wish.

Me: So... no toast or anything.

W.H.A.T.P. (with incredible patience): That's right dear, just liquids.

Me: Okay, Thanks

W.H.A.T.P: No problem. Bye

Hunger makes me stupid.

Can Barium Enemas be Funny, Depends on how you look at it.

Because I have the misfortune of being anemic, I was instructed to have a barium enema test done. Below is a brief description of the procedure from hell.

A barium enema is a procedure used to examine and diagnose problems with the human colon (large intestine). X-ray pictures are taken while barium sulfate fills the colon via the rectum. The patient lies on the x-ray table and a preliminary X-ray is taken. The patient is then asked to lie on the side while a well lubricated enema tube is inserted into the rectum. As the enema enters the body, the patient might have the sensation that their stomach is being filled. A small balloon at the tip of the enema tube may be inflated to help keep the barium inside. The flow of the barium is monitored by the health care provider on an X-ray screen (like a TV monitor). Air may be puffed into the colon to distend it and provide better images (often called a "double-contrast" exam).
The above is courtesy of Wikipedia www.en.wikipedia.org/wiki/barium_enema

The prep that I had to go through the day before, taking laxatives, and drinking that horrible drink and having to run and I MEAN RUN to the bathroom several times was pretty bad, but it was nothing compared to this. I sort of knew what to expect and yet I really didn't see the horror of it all coming. Once I was on the rather cold table, the enema was brought out, see above paragraph as to the procedure. Talk about the feeling of discomfort. It made all my other problems seem really minor by comparison.

Once the barium is in your cramping bowels, you have to turn over on the narrow table so that the barium coats your entire large intestine. So now, not only do you experience an invasive discomfort in the you-know-where, you also now have to worry about not falling off the table which suddenly seems a lot narrower. Then air gets pumped into you to expand your already uncomfortable abdomen. At this point I'm telling myself to think of my happy place and then I remember that, darn it, I haven't really established what my happy place was going to be (though anywhere but where I was at the moment would have been a happy place). Would it be the beach...or...perhaps....a hike in the woods...or....well at least this takes my mind of my current situation which is definitely NOT a day at the beach.

The x-ray machine takes picture after picture, while I have to turn to the left, then to the right, then all around, then back to the left and so on and on and on....

By now I'm feeling clammy and cold because of the chilly room temperatures. The exam room is kept cool for the equipment, but we tough humans don't have such finicky needs, I guess. I'm feeling weak because all I had yesterday was liquids and nothing at all today. At this point I'm really feeling sorry for myself, until a vivid picture of what this must look like flashes in my mind. Here I am on a table in a stupid white gown, with a hose coming out my butt. Now that's funny, but it will never be funny enough that I would EVER want to repeat the procedure just for the laughs.

I have to what?

Had my blood work done recently for my annual checkup (though I use the word annual loosely). Hubby had his done too. Results, his were totally fine. Mine...well I guess I'm low on iron, got a low hemoglobin count etc. That would account for the fact that I have been feeling really tired lately. My doctor wants to find out why my red blood cells are doing a disappearing act so he has recommended a couple of tests for me. #1 was to take stool samples with what looked like popsicle sticks. That was fun. #2 I have to take a barium enema x-ray. Barium and enema are two words I would just as soon not be part of my life. A couple of people I know have been through this ordeal and hinted that it was no day at the beach. yay. I've got to do this on Aug 28th. I'm counting the hours. Since I'm having to go right to the other end of the city from where I live I have been advised to Know Where Available Public Bathrooms Are. I'm probably being a wuss about this, but I really dislike discomfort.

The Secret

When I first read The Secret I thought what a load of simplistic crap--knee jerk reaction I know. It's premise is: focus on what you want and you will get it. Visualize it and it will happen, blah blah blah.

Well, I want to be a published author of supernatural fiction, but after a few false starts I realized I wasn't getting anywhere in the world of authorship. Didn't really have a story outline or anything. I don't think I'm very good at sentence structure. Ernest Hemingway is not in my blood. So much for visualizing me finishing a super great novel. Booooo The Secret.

But wait a minute. I'm writing this blog...6 months ago I didn't even know what blogs were, much less that I'd be writing one.

OK, so I'm not writing a best selling fiction novel (Dean Koontz does not have to worry about competition from me...yet).

OK I'm not published, but there are people reading this blog. Well, my family reads this blog, sometimes.

OK The Secret's law of attraction theory didn't quite work out the way I visualized, but I am writing, people are reading this (at least there is a potential that people outside my family will read this) and most important of all, I am really enjoying blogging (using my creative juices, pulp and all).

Maybe there is something to the Secret after all.

There is a saying "Do what you love, the money will follow" we'll see...

When will I ever learn?

Went miniature golfing again with my man, Mephostopheles. I'm not even going to talk about what my score was, I am too ashamed. And, no, I didn't win. I hate miniature golfing.

Miniature Golfing

Mephistopheles (aka Derek) talked me into going miniature golfing last night. Now, I'm the type of person that once supper is over and the dishes are done, all I want to do is become a couch potato for the rest of the night. I'm not proud of this, but that's the way I am. Anyway, after weaseling out of mini golf a couple of times already this summer, I dragged myself to this one with the attitude that it was going to be a couple of hours out of my life, and I could then resume my couch potato lifestyle. Turns out we had a lot of fun. I got to tease hubby on the fact that I tied his score (until he re-added and bested me by 2 points). That didn't matter, what's important was that he golfs though not often. I never golf. I have no sport acumen whatsoever, I suck at all sports, and the fact that he only beat me by 2 measly points doesn't look good on him. I'm definitely sure that the next time we play, I will emerge the winner, my new strategy being not whacking the ball with all my might and hoping it doesn't bounce out of the game. I'm a quick learner. Needless to say, when I win, I will gloat big time. Can't wait.

TED Ideas worth spreading

I just spent a productive couple of hours watching ted.com (www.ted.com) . It's an excellent site that I know I'm going to look at again and again (which is pretty good since I have a pretty short attention span). My two fav's so far were Arthur Benjamin does Mathemagic and Ze Frank who was pretty funny. I also watched Karen Armstrong speak on religion, and Susan Blackmore speak on memes. Interesting stuff.

Ummm I guess I'd better get back to my work, like working on my website... ahem www.moonstonepath.com , filling out those pesky business tax forms, answering those purchasing requests, oh wait, I haven't had one purchasing request on my website yet, What Am I Doing Wrong? ahhhh what the heck, I'm going back to TED, it's time well spent...or is it?

Maid Service

I've always thought it would be really great if I had a cleaning lady come in once a week to clean my house, but I never thought it would really happen, after all I am not made of money...yet...come on Law of Attraction!! Anyway, I have recently acquired a cleaning lady. My daughter Julie. She comes in once a week, I give her a list of things to do, and she does a great job, and I pay her. Times are tight for Julie these days, her hours got cut back at the store, and her summer classes (she teaches dance and is very good at it) have been reduced, so for the next month or so, she can use the extra money. It's a win win situation. I hate dusting, so Julie does it. I hate cleaning the blinds, so Julie does them (she hates it too but oh well....am I enjoying this a little too much maybe?) There will come a time soon when her store hours and dance studio hours increase and I will be happy for her despite the fact that I will lose my cleaning woman. Not to mention, my home will probably become a little more dusty.

EFT for Procrastinators

I've been reading up on EFT (Emotional Freedom Technique). It involves tapping at certain points on your face and fingers like around your eyes, under your nose, your chin etc. This, along with set-up phrases such as: "Even though I procrastinate getting my work done, I deeply and completely accept myself." For more information on this technique go to www.emofree.com

You do some rounds of tapping until your need to procrastinate goes away (apparently sometimes forever), and of course once cured, you never procrastinate again, getting all kinds of work and projects done.

My problem is, I keep putting off doing this. I keep putting off using EFT to end procrastination. Ah well, I'll get to it someday.....

Ordering coffee at an English Tea-house - is that wrong?

Had a great Canada Day. First Mephostopheles and I went to the St. Jacob's Market near Kitchener and bought all sorts of goodies - fudge, apple fritters, perogies ahhhhh. Then we walked by the river in Stratford, ON and got to see baby ducklings. We finished up the day by a walk on the beach at Port Stanley, ON and I found a small piece of beach glass. Could the day have been any better!!!

Anyway, before our walk by the river, we stopped at a small English tea-house in Shakespeare, ON. They are famous for their scones and devon cream, and, my British hubby wanted me to experience them. I'd never been there so this was to be a real treat. Everything was going well until I ordered coffee. When I eat desert type treats, I prefer coffee to tea. Actually I prefer coffee to tea all the time. I'll drink tea (mint) occasionally, but otherwise coffee it is. Poor Meph. he was mortified. Coffee in an English tea-house! Unthinkable. Now you know that when we actually go to England and we go to a tea-house there, guess what I'll order to drink. I can hardly wait.

Another Embarassing Moment

Went to the Dentist today to have a mould taken of my teeth. Apparently I grind my teeth at night and need a mouth guard.
It wasn't a good experience, but it certainly was memorable. I found out that I gag easily. When they put a form filled with sticky pink stuff on my upper teeth, I gagged and then threw up all over myself. What fun!

Hostas and other surprises

I'm not an experienced gardener, so I get to have many surprises as I freely plant what I get on sale at various garden centres. Take hostas, for example. Really, take some. I didn't know that the tiny potted hosta I brought home 3 years ago would turn into something from the Jurassic Park! It's almost taller than my Juniper shrub! It's so big, it's almost intimidating. Oh, how I laugh now at my sillyness when I planted 3 cute little hostas (don't ask me their names because I didn't keep the little cards that came with them) in a tiny patch of dirt by my front door. They have overtaken my Rose of Sharon, which means that I will have to split them up and find more space for them (or give them to family who, I'm sure, will be grateful when their gardens are taken over by these gorgeous plants). The thing about hostas is...I love 'em. I wish I had a big space so I could have more of them. I have a friend who has at least a hundred hostas in her huge backyard. She just bought 25 more (they were on sale).
By the way - I didn't know that forget-me-not's were such an aggressive spreader. They're pretty though, but come on... my neighbours are having them sprout in their lawns. I got some 'splainin to do.

Artistry is not always genetic

My husband's Dad, Tom, submitted one of his oil paintings at a charity event and it sold for $150.00. A lot of people were interested in it, some even took pictures of it. Now Tom is not a professional artist, oil painting, like his amazing electric train set, is a hobby. He taught himself, and has painted a few rather nice country scenes. I'm rather proud of the in-law.
The following morning, darling hubby, Mephistopheles, who cuts me up a kiwi fruit in the morning for breakfast presented said kiwi and said "well? What do you think of it?" I looked at the kiwi then at his expression of creative accomplishment and said "ummm, looks like a good kiwi."
"No no" he said "what do you think of my picture?"
I replied "It's very nice, abstract is it? 'Kiwi pieces randomly placed', very chic."
"No no" the love of my life said, "it's a happy face".
Hmmm, just wasn't seeing it. Mephistopheles, bless his darling soul, has not inherited his father's artistic abilities.

I am not a restaurant!!!

Is it just me or does having to come up with a meal idea everyday really suck. Sometimes, not often, I have the urge to cook and go at it with wild abandon. OK, that's exaggerating just a little. Sometimes I hate cooking less than other times - there, that's closer to the truth. Figuring out what to make for supper occupies my mind way more than I would like it to. I am disinclined to prepare a week's worth of menus every Sunday night - even though it would probably make my life easier. I just don't wanna do it. I have tried affirmations such as "I love to cook" "I create great meals everyday" yeah, right. It's like there are two of me. Me #1 wants to prepare nutritious homemade meals with fresh veggies out of the garden for my child and my husband, Mephistopheles. Me #2 doesn't want to have to deal with all that when there are so many other things (like blogging) that I would prefer to do. Anyhoo, there's my rant...venting is good.

Eating well

Bok Choy, flax seeds, bran, spinach, romaine lettuce, fruits, I've been eating it all and decreasing my consumption of meats. Decreasing, not totally eliminating, baby steps you know. And I've got to say, I feel better. Not a whole lot better because I still eat stuff like cheesecake, perogies, mashed potatoes with butter, but the healthy food consumption is definitely increasing. Now if I could only make myself exercise I'm sure I would be in even better shape. It's a little depressing that I am out of breath after carrying an armful of laundry up two flights of stairs.

Skinny Bitch book

Just got done reading "Skinny Bitch" by Rory Freedman and Kim Barnouin. The title led me to believe this was just another "go on a diet so you can be as skinny as a model" piece of crap. I was wrong. This is an in-your-face, informational book on eating the right foods vs eating what all of us non-vegan eat all the time. These ladies do not mince words when it comes to telling it like it is: "Coffee is for pussies. Think about how widely accepted it has become that people need coffee to wake up. You should not need anything to wake up, if you can't wake up without it, it's because you are either addicted to caffeine, sleep deprived, or a generally unhealthy slob." (excerpt from pg 15 "Skinny Bitch"). They then list what caffeine can do to you, not a pretty picture. The book then goes on to describe how meat and dairy products are not good for you. Scary facts. Then Rory and Kim describe the conditions which cows, pigs and chickens live in, and what happens in slaughterhouses...for those of us who get queasy easily, and in this case even not so easily, Chapter 4, Chapter 6 and parts of Chapter 9 are definitely chapters you may want to avoid reading. Very disturbing. The rest of the book gives good information on the nutrients we need and what foods contain them, and there is even a month's worth of 3 meals a day menu examples for our use. As I am writing this blog, I am guzzling a can of pop, but now I'm not enjoying it as much as I used to. Damn.
Note: This is not a book to read if you don't like swear words. To me, it just adds to the charm.

Learning to Network

Networking is something I haven't done much. Being a shy person, networking seems to be harder than climbing Mount Everest. However, I own a small retail business and online store and I've been told that I need to get my name out there.
Attended my first networking seminar and actually enjoyed it. Still, when it comes to the thought of attending these functions, I can feel my heart beat faster (and not in happy anticipation), and all my self-esteem issues that I thought I had buried in the back-forty of my mind resurface with a vengeance. However, it's time to go beyond my comfort zone and get on with it. I love my business and I want to see it flourish, so if I have to go out and network, so be it. If anybody has any ideas how to attend such functions without breaking out in a clammy nerve-racked sweat, please let me know. By the way, check out my website: http://www.moonstonepath.com I also have a blog there, that relates to the products I sell.

A Humbling Experience

Visited the in-laws tonight. Both are in their 80's and still going pretty strong, though Dad had a nasty virus that knocked him for a loop. Anyway, we were there and they were commenting that the screen on their new computer (state-of-the-art flat screen, unlike my old clunker) was too bright and it bothered their eyes. So I said that they could adjust the brightness, and adjusted it for them. Felt pretty much like a genius, showing the in-laws how to "make that nasty screen easier on the eyes", awwww they're so cute, didn't know about the brightness button. How clever I was, how righteously smarter-than-smart!

Ego still inflated, I went into the spare bedroom with mom-in-law to check out the food cabinet and there, in it's full outstanding blazing glory was my pater-in-law's model train set that he is working on. "Model train set" are not words that justify this amazing work of art and technology. It's a small village, a reproduction of Wallsend in England of past, complete with houses, fire house, churches, schools (all painstakenly put together) 5 or 6 railroad tracks, a tunnel through a mountain, working trains, landscaping (a winter scene), and that's just for starters. Look underneath the table (easily 8 x 8 feet) and you see a mass of electronic wiring to rival something at NASA (ok I may be exaggerating, but you get my meaning). This is not a model train set this is a MODEL TRAIN SET. I cannot imagine the amount of planning and hours that went into the construction of this work of genius - I tell you, my jaw dropped. Ego is now deflated.

Leopards and spots...

My husband, Mephostopheles, has shaved his beard and he doesn't look quite so devilish anymore. Doesn't LOOK devilish anymore. That British cynical sense of humour hasn't disappeared with the face fuzz (thank goodness).

Things I need to make my day more comfortable

Metamucil. How sad. Though I must say, the orange flavoured Metamucil doesn't taste too bad. Gotta go!

American Idol

Michael Johns voted off American Idol. Unbelievable. My daughter is unconsolable...er... inconsolible...unconso...cannot be consoled. And yes, I'm donating to American Idol gives back. Why not, every bit helps. New favourite: that Jason Castro kid with the dreadlocks. Cute, good stage presence and unique sound. GO JASON!!! Daughter does not agree with me. She's cheering for Dave Cook. He's alright too, I guess. GO JASON!!!! Go Dave!!!!!

Not as easy as it seems

OK, I finally got back onto my blog... er... spot. After several attempts with various passwords I finally asked for help and somehow reset my google password, does that mean blogger.com is part of google?
I have several different passwords, and though I keep a list of them, I frequently misplace my list. Should I have just one password for everything I join? Doesn't that create a danger of password identity theft. Someone could use my password and put stuff online that could get me in trouble with the FBI. AACK I just wrote FBI, now they'll have me on their most wanted list AACK I just wrote "most wanted" another danger phrase. AACK - danger AACK.
Or...am I being too paranoid?

My first blog!

Wow this is exciting. My first blog with bloggers.com. My biggest worry is how am I going to find it again once I log out. Yeah, I obsess over the most simple things, however, I don't remember my complete url. Well, I guess the thing to do is logout, and try logging back in. right...